Faithful are the wounds of a friend

“Hello, all of you beautiful souls watching this video. I have to say I’m just feeling very called to reveal my testimony on my ‘come to Jesus’ moment in my life.

Yeah, so this is going to be my very first YouTube video. And I decided to use my testimony as my first video. So for those of you watching who don’t know me, my name is Tracy Wren, and I am founder of ‘My Hippie Life Coach’. I am a Christian business and life coach. And I help women create honorable, online businesses that serve others while also serving the Lord.

Now, it was not always like that. I used to claim myself as a spiritual life coach. You know, spiritual manifestation stuff. OK? And so let’s just jump right into it. Shall we?

In early 2017 I launched an online coaching business, and I claimed myself as a spiritual coach. And at that time, I had every single book that you can imagine that had to do with manifesting, having power and control of your life, and all of these self-help books. You name it, I read it. And I am a sponge. I absorb anything and everything that is thrown at me. And so as these things were thrown at me, I applied them to my life. And it did bring me fast success. I was making more money at my life coaching business in one month than I did at my marketing job. And that’s when it really hit me. And I kind of got scared because I didn’t understand in what realm like how I actually manifested things. And that frightened me.

In that time I actually separated from people in my life and relationships. I was being pulled in by money. Like money was my master. And I would constantly think about it, constantly want it, and desire it, and it was my master, unfortunately. So I had a really, really good friend. She was one of my closest friends. A ‘soul sister’, I called her. She knew that she was.

We were always close. You know, we had our on and off moments. So, [because I was being pulled into money?] I didn’t talk to her for about 8 months. Some of our last previous conversations had to do with her feeling that I was messing with evil. OK? Now she wasn’t this ‘holy roller’, as some people call them, or like this ‘high, almighty Christian’, praying type of person. She just had awareness that the things that I was reading, the things that I would talk about to her, that she was like, ‘No!’ She was completely protected and guarded from the things that I was doing. So we naturally parted.

As I was going through life in those 8 months I was being pulled back and forth by this unknown certainty, this unknown energy, this unknown power on what it was, and what I was doing. In this time I went to see this card reader, my house fill[ed] up with flies. My husband thought it was something out of a freak show-like movie. It was really frightening.

After that moment I decided that I was going to hold off on everything that I was possibly doing, because I felt like I wasn’t fully fulfilled. And though I knew that I was supposed to have my own online life coaching business, [though] I knew that I was here to do what I was doing now, but back then I didn’t see how it was going to come into existence because I was in this other realm of getting what you want because you have the power to do it.

As I am pulling myself closer to God and started watching different videos, verses, just getting curious about it. And that’s funny too, because my oldest daughter’s name is ‘Faith’. I was sixteen when I got pregnant with her. I’ve always had faith. I’ve always known this knowing of God. But the word, ‘Jesus’ never came out of my mouth because I was not certain into what He… that was the connection between or the difference between [God and Jesus?]. And then you got the Holy Spirit. I was completely confused and so I was vulnerable. And so when I heard spirituality, I’m like, ‘OK. This talks to me because I don’t really understand all of this other stuff, or any of that sort.’ And the reason that I even call myself a Christian now is because, for me, a Christian is someone who believes in Jesus Christ. And I am very confident in claiming myself as a Christian business coach. Because I truly believe that if your business does not have God, it will fail.  That’s just how it works. and if your business doesn’t fail, your home life will fail because your life and your business go together.

Again, back to my friend, so. Eight months go by. We don’t talk much, and I have a dream about her. It was clear as day. And I heard a voice. And it did sound like a masculine voice. I can’t put like a gender on it, but it was a masculine voice. and there was not background, there was no scenery. There was nothing else except a voice that said, ‘(My friend’s name) is ill.’ I immediately woke up and I knew, I knew in my heart and soul that that message meant in a deeper way that she was ill. This message was clear. I knew something was up. I knew something was going on. /And I acted on it. I said, ‘You know what? I’m going to take this dream. I’m going to take it in an honorable way and do what I feel like Jesus would do. Right there I’m like, ‘OK. What would Jesus do? Jesus had a dream about a friend that He misses. And He thinks about it. And you get a dream that says, ‘She’s ill.’ I’m going to reach out to her. And so I did.

I sent her a message. And I told her that I missed her, and that I loved her. And I hoped that she was well. And she wrote back and she said that she missed me and that she loved me and that she was on her own spiritual journey. I asked her about her journey. I said, ‘Are you journaling?’ she said, ‘Actually I am. I just started and I really like journaling. I wish we could get together sometime because I really do miss you.’ And she said, ‘I love you and miss you, and let’s plan something.’ And I said, ‘Great!’

I was so happy to hear that. She was on a really good path and her mindset was strong. I can tell. I can tell that within that small amount of time of us being apart she became whole in a way that I knew that I wanted for my life as well. And I looked at her with so much inspiration because she was truly brave and had so much courage to go throughout her life journey, how she had a lot of struggles, which she turned into blessings.

Two day after, I get the news that she had heart failure in her apartment and she was currently on life support. I was so shocked and stunned that I was given this dream with this knowledge knowing, knowing that she was ill. I felt so blessed. I did. I felt so blessed that God gave me this dream to reach out to her to say, ‘I love you.’

But, there was something else going on during this time. During this time she was on life support for about 12 or 13 days. During this time I was holding on to these spiritual practices, thinking that I had any power or control over what was going to happen to her life, that I was trying to channel with her. I would sit in deep meditation and try to talk to her because I thought that I could talk to her if she’s in a coma, and guide her back to her body and tell her, ‘Listen you can just heal yourself. You have the power to heal yourself. You have the power to heal yourself.’ Never did I once say anything about Jesus. Never did I once claim and say, ‘Jesus will be with you. Or this or that, or anything of that sort.’ I was just hard-headed and I’m like, ‘You can do this. You can do this.’

And I got nothing. I was on like day 3 or 4 of her being in a coma. Finally I broke down on my knees. And I just called for God, for Jesus, the Holy Spirit, ‘God, whoever You are, I fully understand that I don’t have the power here. I get it. I don’t have the power. And I surrender my desire for power. I surrender all of it to You. Please show me, Jesus, if it’s allowed. Right? Because [of my sinfulness,] I don’t know if it’s allowed. Show me what’s going on [with my friend].’

That night I had another dream. This dream was really vivid. And it gave me all the clarity that I needed. I had a dream that we were walking up a hill. It was like a rocky, coal hill, again no scenery, no background, just darkness really. We were walking up this hill that had steps over the rocks and the coal. And there was two metal bars [railings] that we were able to walk. My friend was in front of me. And she’s walking up. But every time that she would take a step it would crumble before her and she’d fall down and scrape her knees. And then she’d try and go again and it would crumble and fall down before her and it would scrape her knees. And she kept going, and I’m behind her. And it’s easy for me. I can easily just walk up these concrete steps like its nothing. They’re not crumbling underneath me. It’s easy. And so I try to push ‘em. And as I try to give her a boost up, or at least try to help her up these steps because it’s so easy, she stops me. And it was this biggest force ever. And she turned around with this force, and she said, ‘I am not going this way, Tracy.’ And she turned around and went down those steps. And I don’t know where she went. And I woke up.

I knew immediately at that point, immediately that she was passing on [in death]….wherever [some afterlife] because at that point I didn’t know. Like I was questioning everything in my life. I was questioning my business. I questioned my job. I questioned all my relationships. I looked at all of these books that I had on my bookshelves like, ‘What are you? How did you end up here?’ ‘Where do I go?’ So again [I was] on my knees surrendering to the one God, accepting Jesus as our Lord and Saviour, opening the Bible. I was no longer pulled away from the Bible. I wanted to know what this Bible said. I wanted to know what this Bible said. But I couldn’t have done it without this experience. Because right after she had passed someone who was closest to her came to my house, handed me her diary, her journal that she’s been journaling in. And they said, ‘I would like for you to read this. I know how close you guys were. Go ahead and read it.’

So I started to read it. And it was nothing but Bible verses for strength, for trust, bravery, anxiety, fear. She was so smart that she took her illness and she turned it [over] to God and surrendered it to God. And she trusted God. It was[n’t] in her journal, praying or asking for anything. It was like she was in acceptance. It’s like she knew…she lived in a humble way. She started to live very humbly. So I go to the last page of her journal, and it’s dated on the day that I reached out to her. And it had to do with, ‘Jesus is the way, like the light, the only way, the light, the truth …’ You know that verse? I don’t have it right now because I don’t know Bible verses off the top of my head at this point.

But that’s when I’m like, ‘OK. I get it. Thank you.’ Like I was so blessed that she left me this message for my life because I completely took it. And I thank Jesus for giving me that dream to know that she was ill so that I could reach out to her so that we could reconnect. And so that I then in return was able to see her journal exactly how close her relationship was with Jesus Christ, how strong her faith has developed.

She guided me to be more curious about this Jesus that she talked about so much. That’s when it really hit me. I couldn’t believe I was deceived. I couldn’t believe that I was at a place, at such vulnerability. I was pulled into a direction that is not of the good. And you know it’s not of the good just by doing it, and by feeling that money is your master.

In the Bible there’s a verse and I just read it…. And God says you cannot have two masters. It’s either God or money. [‘No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.’ (Matt. 6:24)].

In this spiritual realm, everything that they’re doing is to have money, or be in aligned with the universe. Jesus is not the universe. Ok? God is the creator of the universe. Jesus is where it’s at, people. It’s just where it’s at. There is no other master. You cannot have two masters. So you get to decide on who your master is. And I decided, I decided, I was no longer obsessing over money. I none, zero. Money has no more power over my life. I’m going to do what I’m called to do with the word of God. And show up the best way that I know I possibly can, which is true. I’m going to be real. I’m going to be authentic. And I’m going to show you how to just live in an honorable way. And how you can create an online business that serves others while also pleasing the Lord.

You don’t have to sacrifice your entire belief system that you feel in your heart, that you know it’s there. It’s something that you can’t deny. It’s something that we’re all curious about because we’re all headed to death. We all will go there. Now what people think about the afterlife and whatever else, people also have to think about what [serving?] God possibly could be. And you have people that are into this scientific, logic, you know, mindset. And they will not claim Jesus, but they will talk about the universe, and energy, and frequencies, and blah, blah, blah.

And yes, that stuff will work for your life. It does. I’m living proof. It works. But let me tell you something. It speaks clearly in the Bible that spiritism and all of these things are not of the good. Now you [the surrendered Christian] can still achieve everything. But not in this way [of spiritualism].

The other way in which you can be achieving things is by doing it in a way in which God would want you to do that. And it’s not to think about you, but to think about others, and how you can serve others with the gifts that you were given. We each have different gifts that we were given, and we can help different people with those gifts. When you act from a mindset and a heart of giving, rather than receiving, and you completely take money out of your mindset, you are just naturally rewarded, with money, yes. But it comes naturally. You don’t have to manifest for it. Manifesting makes you believe that you already don’t have it, that you have to do things to have to manifest to get it.

Whereas if you were to just read the book of life, which is the Bible, you would see that all of those things are already there for you. You just have to trust. You just have to completely have trust. You have to put your foot forward into faith; and that’s exactly what I have been doing. And I have been pulled into this beautiful era of my life. I’m 29. I’ll be 30 soon, like in 2 months. And my 29th year of life has been my most, best year ever. I have been pulled out of deception. And I see it for everything that it is, and I am just rocking it. You can do the same thing for your life.

I hope this story was inspiring to you. There you have it. That is my testimony. That is how I have been brought to Jesus, and then completely changed my entire business model to reflect pleasing the Lord and glorifying God. I’ve never been happier in my life! This is what I’m here to do, and if you’re feeling called to do something very similar, then you can just press the link below and we can chat I am tracy@myhippielife.com. There you have it. MyHippieLifeCoach.com.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=belXYgSyv7I