A gentle and loving, albeit self-indulgent sinner meets a more gentle and loving, and altogether self-denying Saviour
“Because he hath set his love upon Me, therefore will I deliver him: I will set him on high because he hath known My name.” (Ps. 91:14)
“In the 4 years that I’ve been in this apartment, more has happened to me than has happened in my entire life.”
“This testimony kind of starts
when I was 13 years old and I was in my bedroom. And I heard my dad, he was
outside doing yard work, and he called me. His voice was like, ‘Get out here
quick, there’s something out there that you’ve got to see.’ And so I ran out to
the back yard, and my dad was looking at these three orange lights in the sky.
And it looked like they were playing tag. They were chasing each other around
really fast. It almost looked like how bees would be, how they can really fly
around really fast. Of course, these were bigger than bees, and they were
lights. And this was in early evening time. And they were chasing each other
around. There’s three of them, and like two would be chasing one, the one was
being chased and then there was another [that] would chase another one, and they would
zip up into the sky and disappear. And then they would come back down. And they
weren’t very far from us. I mean they were like 30 yards. And my dad had seen
them when they flew over his head, so I didn’t see them when they flew over our
head. Over his head I didn’t see them. He said that they looked metallic. And
by the way, this isn’t about aliens; it’s about Jesus.
Anyway, so, I wasn’t raised
religious at all. I did have close cousins. My dad would drop me off when he’d
go to work with my cousins. And I had 4 cousins, and my aunt who would watch
me. And one of my cousins was around my age, and so we became really good
friends. And, I would have to…they were Catholic at the time. They have since
switched to…I think they go to a non-denominational is what they do, except for
my uncle. He did stay in the Catholic Church. So we would go to midnight Mass,
and this. And I would always ask questions. I’m like, ‘What is this? You know,
kids are supposed to be in bed at this time. Why are we out?’ I’ve always been very
sensitive. And so I always question, and asked them, ‘Why is there altar boys?’
And there was one priest who would be in this room with the door open, and
would be peaking and looking at me. I was probably, I don’t know, seven, six.
And so I would ask my cousin. I would be like, ‘Why is he staring at me? What’s
he doing?’ And so I named the guy, ‘Peek-a-boo Priest’. And so that was an
inside joke we had for a long time, ‘Peek-a-boo Priest’.
But, that didn’t get me to want
to go to church very much, I went to Sunday school. In fact, me and my
step-mother got into a terrible crash… a car accident when I was six. And she
was wearing a seatbelt and she actually went, her legs went into the van, and
the glass went all over her. I was just sitting in the front seat with her with
no seatbelt. And it was like somebody was holding me in there. And as soon as
the crash was over she was just…it looked like Carrie, the movie Carrie, there
was blood just coming down and she was screaming. She looked over at me because
she probably thought I was dead. Not a scratch. And then my door opens and here’s
this woman from Sunday school, who got me out of the van and put me in the back,
she had a station wagon. She put me in the back of that. She kept telling me,
‘Get down, stay down.’ I wanted to see the van, and I did see it. It was
terrible. It was demolished.
We saw these lights and
stuff. And me and my dad, we didn’t really talk about it much. I didn’t think
about it much. I put the experience into my pocket, saved it, thought about it every
once in a while, ‘Wow, wasn’t that kind of strange?’ I had a lot of other
experiences happen. I had a really close friend. He fell asleep at the wheel.
He died real tragically. It’s a pretty grotesque story actually. And he was a Jehovah’s
Witness. He was trying to tell me about, you know, their beliefs and all this
stuff before he had passed. He got into Jehovah’s Witness the last three years
of his life, or two. And I just though it was strange. I didn’t know what to
think of religion. I always did, though, I prayed every night. And I think I prayed
for my meals. And I did it in the typical Catholic, ‘Father, Son, and Holy
Spirit’ thing. And it was a real quick prayer. It didn’t mean much. But I always
just had this hunch, ‘I think Jesus is real.’ And I always had this feeling
that everything I did I was being watched. Like I said I am very sensitive. And
I can tell what people are…their emotions and stuff. I can feel them. So I always
knew somebody was watching me—God, or whoever.
I always did respect Jesus. I didn’t know nothing about the Bible. Around the time that my friend passed away, I came to work one day. This is in 2001 and I came to work. I would go to a home where three developmentally disabled adults lived, and I would make their dinners, and stuff like that. And you know, watch them, help them. And I come to work one day before they would get dropped off by Good Will, where they worked and get dropped on the bus. And I would come early and get stuff going and ready for them. So I come to work, there’s this gift for me. I doesn’t say it’s from anybody, just, ‘To Travis.’ And I opened it up and it was a Bible. And it had my name inscribed on it right here [he points to its bottom right corner]. I just thought it was really cool. I really liked… Its actually an NIV. I’ll talk more about that.
I always did respect Jesus. I didn’t know nothing about the Bible. Around the time that my friend passed away, I came to work one day. This is in 2001 and I came to work. I would go to a home where three developmentally disabled adults lived, and I would make their dinners, and stuff like that. And you know, watch them, help them. And I come to work one day before they would get dropped off by Good Will, where they worked and get dropped on the bus. And I would come early and get stuff going and ready for them. So I come to work, there’s this gift for me. I doesn’t say it’s from anybody, just, ‘To Travis.’ And I opened it up and it was a Bible. And it had my name inscribed on it right here [he points to its bottom right corner]. I just thought it was really cool. I really liked… Its actually an NIV. I’ll talk more about that.
I thought, ‘Wow. This is
interesting.’ Because my friend had just passed away. And when we went to his
funeral, his, I don’t know what they call Jehovah Witnesses’ preachers, I guess
they are still called preachers, he said—my friend’s name was Jeremiah—he
said, ‘Jeremiah is in darkness now’, because he had taken an anti-anxiety
medication. We would drink a lot, and we would smoke pot, and he took that pill
and that’s what happened to him. So in the religion of Jehovah’s Witnesses, I don’t
know if it’s true, he was in, I don’t know, outer darkness, or in darkness, I don’t
know. That’s what he said though. And I remember I had my cousin with me, and
she was a Catholic. So it was another cousin, but she was in the same family I stayed
with when I was younger. And it really threw her off. And I remember we went
back to my house, and she just wouldn’t stop. She was like, it really affected
her. It really bothered her. And she didn’t even know him. And I didn’t even know
what to think.
But here I come to my job, and
here is this book, this Bible. And so I’m going to read it. I’m going to give
this a try. I’m 30, 28, 29, 30 [years old]. And so I begin at the very beginning, and read
the entire Bible. And it was like reading Chinese. I, there might have
been, I mean I’m sure, I remember when I would read it it would get me to think…I
never really felt the Lord’s presence, or anything when I read it, which is…. I
don’t understand that.
So anyway, during this time,
in this house that I worked in I would get these weird feelings. And there was
a lot of people that worked there, mostly females. And they were, they were
different. And there was a lot going on there, with them, not me. You know, I could
just feel a[n evil] presence in that place. And there was. One of the men that
I took care of, he was just a happy-go-lucky guy. I worked there for 4 years—I
knew these guys, this was 3 years into working there—I knew these guys. And
this man—he’s no longer here anymore—he was just a happy guy. He came and sat
on my lap. He loved to unload the dishwasher, and there was dishes that just
got done. And he said, ‘Wanna go unload the dishwasher?!’ (His name was John).
And I go, ‘Yeah John, let’s do that.’ We get up and we run. And we go into
the kitchen. Just as we get in there, I’m opening up the dishwasher, and this
voice comes out of John, and this isn’t John. And it shocked me. It really
surprised me. And what he said was, I’ll try to imitate it the best I can. This
is going to sound really ridiculous. I don’t care, though. He goes, ‘YOU’RE
GOING TO HELL!’ Now take that times 100 million. No movie or Hollywood
could, you know, no movie could come close to imitating this. This was not even
human. And, so I go, ‘What did you say, John?’ [John said,] ‘John don’t know.’
I asked other people, ‘Does John ever, you know [talk like that]?’ [Each of the other workers would all say,] ‘No.’ ‘No.’
‘No’, ‘No.’ ‘No.’ It wasn’t John, it was a demon that saw me coming to work an
hour early every day, and sitting there and reading the Bible there. That’s
what I was doing when I read the Bible, I would actually come to work an hour
early and I would read that Bible. And I knew, I could just feel something was
in there [in the house], more than once.
So I just let that go, no big
deal. All right. I went on with my sinful life. I was living with this girl. I was
actually divorced, divorced for a good reason. And here I am now living with
this girl. And I didn’t know what was going on. I remember sometimes I’d wake
up in the middle of the night and go…I would just wake up and go, ‘I’m going to
cease to exist some day!’ And that would like…I would panic, as if that would
really be terrible. You know, as if that would be worse than going to hell.
The first thing I ever heard
about when it came to the Bible when I was little, was my aunt. Like I was
telling you, I was there a lot with my cousins, the first introduction to scripture
I ever had was her reading Revelations. That didn’t make me want to go to
church. It really scared me away from it. I just thought if this is the way,
you know… I always thought it was just religion. I considered Catholic
doctrine, and all that religion, for certain [there is] worse than that even. But,
I don’t judge anybody for that at all. I have an uncle [in the Catholic Church]
and I love him so much. I mean, we talked about Jesus all the time.
So, anyway, I get into
drinking and smoking pot. The relationship with that girl didn’t work. I had a
failed marriage. Every relationship I ever had with a woman was just terrible.
I wasn’t the best either. So, I would come home at night—I worked in the
evening—and stare out into the darkness. I just mean staring out into the
darkness, and just saying, ‘I’m missing out on something. I’m missing out on… What
am I supposed to be doing? What am I here for? Why am I here?’ And I sunk into
a deep, dark depression. I only drank once a week, on Saturday, on my day off.
I would drink enough for that whole week on that one night. I would just drink
a ton. I was really a big guy then. Like I worked out like ridiculous amount of
hours, six days a week. (Real vain.) So I got into that [weight lifting?].
And it got worse. And I got
into pills. And during this time I’m just starting to get into pills, and I’d
been in some bands and stuff before this. I sang, I was a singer. I taught
myself to play guitar. And I quit these bands because I got tired of dealing
with the other band mates. And I began to have some experiences. Once I was
sitting there, playing my guitar, and something tapped me on the back, you know.
[Travis acts it out by immediately turning around] and there was nothing there. One
time I’m sitting on my bed and I can feel something behind me. I know something
is behind me and I turn around and I look. And the curtain raises up, not like
one of these [venetian blinds]. But the curtain raised up and just held there. It
was one of those drapes. And it raised all
the way up and just held there. I’m like, [Travis gives a stare of surprise and
disbelief]. I even called a friend, I’m like, ‘Man, there is, you know….’ And
there was all kinds of stuff going on. I didn’t know what. I thought they were
ghosts is what I thought. And so I was into ghosts now.
Around 2013 I started to get
these strange, not audible or anything, just this feeling in me saying, ‘Go
outside, go out in the front yard.’ And it would like 12 at night, 1 in the
morning. ‘Go outside and look up into the sky and wait.’ And I’d go out looking
up into the sky, wait… like, ‘What the heck am I waiting for!? Is this going to
be another alien?’ So, nothing showed up. (Thank God). That’s nothing. Wait
until you hear….
And so my drug use really
took off. I was taking a prescription of Oxycodone. I was taking Methadone. I was
taking anything, like any sort of opiate I could get my hands on and buy. I purchased
it. That’s where almost all my money went to. I eventually had to move out of
my apartment and move back in with my dad because of my drug habit. And I lied
to him. Of course, I didn’t tell him. And it got really dark and bad. And then
I stepped it up and became IV [intervenous] drug user. Then, of course, what comes after
pills? Heroine. While all this is going on, I’m battling this addiction, I’m
going from sick to OD to sick to OD. I OD’d a whole bunch of times. I mean a
whole bunch of times. I don’t know how I made it. I mean I know now. It was Jesus,
He allowed me to live.
I remember even before all of
this, when I would drink hard alcohol and I’d get so drunk that if I had passed
out, [and if] people who would try to move me or touch me or anything like that, I’d
freak out on them. I mean, I would freak out. And there was a time once I ended
up at some party and I was with my friends. I was really wild, and I would just
ditch my friends and go find a party. You know, strangers, and go off with
them. And end up at who knows where. And I was at this party and the next thing
you know I had to go outside to throw up. And they put me in the back of a
truck, and next thing you know I’m at a park. And it was snowing. And somebody
called the police, and like I wouldn’t even let the police touch me.
But this was another time
where I was living in this apartment, and I was really, really drunk off hard
alcohol again, and the snow was up to my knees. And I figured, ‘I’m going to go
on a snow walk!’ And this place where I went out to it’s a rock quarry. And
there’s nothing out there. Nothing. There’s a road that leads out and you just
go. There’s nobody out there. This was late, late at night. And I went out
there. And I walked and I walked and I walked, until I was like, ‘Not going to
make it home. Not going to make it home.’
So I turned around, I’m not even close to home. And I’m like, ‘Ok I’m probably
going to fall right about over here. I’m going to fall in the snow, nobody is
going to see me. This is where I’m going…, you know, to be found once the snow
goes away. So I remember my last, or what I thought I was my last thing I’d
see, and that was all white as I’d fall into the snow. This was Christmas Eve.
I wake up Christmas morning in my apartment, on a couch. Family left, everybody
is gone, doing Christmas. And I’m like, ‘No way. No.’ Because there’s no way I could
have made it. I’m like, ‘Could somebody have found me or saw me? I’m going to go
look.’ I run out there. I go out to the road where it is. And there is just one
set of tracks going out there. Nothing coming back.
Stuff like that happened to
me all the time. Everybody thought I was going to die all the time. My dad even
said, you know, it was just a known thing that I was going to die soon and, you
know, well before my dad. And, you know, that’s the way it is. And my dad sat
around waiting for the call. And, by the way, this isn’t bragging at all. This
is stupidity. I always had to learn the hard way.
And so, I’m into heroine. It
got really dark. I OD’d a million times. Never went to the hospital once. And
then I got into…I needed to quit heroine. And the people I would get heroine
from they also did Meth. But I never did it because I just hated it. I couldn’t
stand it. And so this woman one night, she goes, ‘I’m going to give you a $20
shot of Meth.’ I’m like, ‘All right.’ So I took this stupid Meth. And I got a
lightbulb on my head thinking, ‘This is how I’m going to quite heroine.’ Good
idea, huh? Yeah, really good idea. So I used that [Meth]. I succeeded. I got
off heroine. Hmm, Good job [Travis]! [sarcasm] And now I got another problem. Oh, this time, oh
man, that stuff turns you into a monster. And so I ended up homeless and crazy
stuff was going on. And I’m not even talking about my teen life. My life was
pretty nuts anyway. There’s a lot I’m skipping. I’m trying to get to what I’m
trying to get to [the testimony for Jesus].
And so I’m homeless, I’m in
and out of jail for stupid things like, No trespassing. One time I wanted a
place to sleep. So I went into a store, grabbed a candy bar, went up to the
counter and said, ‘I’m going to be stealing this, you can call the police on
me.’ So, a cop walks in right as I do that, and I start going outside, and the
cop walks in and they tell the cop. And he goes, he yells at me. He goes, ‘Put
that candy bar back!’ So I go and put it back. He says, ‘I’m not going to
arrest you....’ (I [Travis] live in a town where there is three cities.) He said, ‘I’m
a cop from the other city.’ So, and then I remember I went up to the top of the
train tracks and I was like this [Travis puts his face looking down glumly with
cheeks on fists], and he [the policeman] was on a motorcycle and he just drives
around, didn’t even look at me. And so I ended up selling my truck. I sold a
lot of cars for drugs. And I end up getting [a] motel.
One of the places that I worked
at there was a woman there that was a
nurse, and we were good friends. We got along really, really, good. Nobody else
seemed to really get along with her. She was really kind of grumpy to
everybody. And I would just help her out. And I always, you know, we ate all
the time together. There was nothing romantic, there was nothing anything like
that. So I knew her life, and she had a daughter. And I knew all about it, what
was going on. And her daughter was having problems with drugs. And she
had cancer. And she was going through...she got done with Chemo, actually this
is two testimonies. This is mine and hers. And I’m the only one who can tell
hers.
And so I’m in contact with
her. And I’ll be honest, this is so sad. I was in contact with her because I knew
her daughter did drugs. And I thought, ‘OK. Well, I’ll just get her daughter to
like me and get drugs.’ And so I ended up here one day. Yeah. I ended up here, that’s
where I’m at right now. This was our apartment. This is where it all happened.
And I love this place. This place, I’ll never forget this apartment. Anyway,
and in the 4 years that I’ve been in this apartment, more has happened to me
than has happened in my entire life. So I come over here and I see what’s going
on. And I’m really appalled by it. And here I’m a drug addict. But, you know,
her daughter, wasn’t helping her. Here she [his roommate] was, and I mean, she
could barely lift a finger, and she had to go shopping and stuff. She had to do
everything. And her daughter was just here with these people doing drugs. I’ve
never really, and I’m not saying I’m better or good, I’m just really picky about who
I hang out with. And I never seemed to really get along with other drug addicts,
probably just because I didn’t want to share [my drugs]. But, all my friends
were sober. So, you know, I was just sickened by what I saw when I got here.
But of course that didn’t
stop me from pretty much using this situation to help my drug addiction. And
so, yeah, I didn’t really get that much drugs from her because she didn’t have
that much money. I mean, I was able to sell things I had and stuff, but she was
out of control. Her daughter was out of control.
And so I was back and forth.
Like I said I had a rented, at first I rented a motel that’s just down the
street here. I was doing Meth. And that wasn’t working good for me… [End of
first part of his testimony, and a gap in between first and second parts of his
testimony]
…I asked her [the roommate’s
daughter] for the machete. She left. Then she tried to get in and I wouldn’t
let her in. By that time my friend [his roommate] showed up here, and I was still
trying to get the machete. Eventually her daughter snuck up here and opened the
door, unlocked the door with her keys and got in. And she was a very, I’m a pretty
big guy, 6’5”, about 235 [pounds] and she’s bigger than me, taller too. And I didn’t
know if she had the machete or what. But she got into the door. She hit me, about, I don’t know, like 13 times in the face. I was just caught off guard and
I didn’t have any...I was, I kind of fell down, or something, when she came in.
And she was punching me, and she couldn’t punch very hard. So, I’m glad for
that. I finally got her down on the floor. She was screaming. I held her down.
She was screaming, and kicking, and spitting. I held her for fifteen minutes. Got out of this apartment. There’s all these people out here and they’re yelling at
me and telling me I shouldn’t beat up women, and stuff.
And so anyway she ended up
going to jail. And a police officer that was here, he was the captain of the
police department, he stayed here for 3 hours afterward, and talked about Jesus.
I got really excited. And he told us about a church that is here in this town. It’s
called, ‘Calvary’. And he anointed us, and stuff. After the police left, we
found the church. And anyway, I ended up staying here. And her daughter was
sending people over here to, I guess to kick my butt, or something. And so what
I did was I chased all these people away because they basically wanted to kick
me out of here and then continue using this as a place to do drugs.
And once in a while I’d let somebody
in because I would want some drugs from them. Not many. And then I would like
kick them out of here. And so anyway we stayed here. My room…now my friend is
my roommate. And I’ll just refer to her as my roommate from here on. Like I said
this is a double testimony. It’s hers too. So I’m staying here. I’m doing
drugs. I found out she’s a real enabler and I used that for my advantage. I used
to be real good at doing that. I used her and she…I loved her, I just had a
drug problem, which is not an excuse. But I did that, she enabled me, she
bought me drugs. And so, you know, I thought, ‘Well, this is great.’ I stayed
here. She kept...you know, she wanted to go to church. She wanted to find Jesus.
And I was kind of like, ‘Well, we’ll do that maybe tomorrow, or something.’
And so I started looking into
stuff, and doing tons of research. I would do like 13 hours a day of
researching stuff. Like I started out with kind of like 9/11 because I always
wanted to look into that. And I really looked into that. And I looked into a
whole bunch of stuff. And next thing you know I’m getting into New Age stuff.
Then I remembered the UFOs
that me and my dad saw. And I thought, ‘That’s what I’m going to get into.
That’s what I’m going to find out about. I want to know about what were those
things that we saw. I wanted to know what that is.’ And I found a guy who is on
YouTube, and he’s a pretty popular guy in the UFO and alien, I don’t know whatever
you call it, the alien scene, I don’t know. And he teaches you how to summon
aliens. And I just thought, ‘Huh’, you know. And I followed his instructions
and I went out on the deck. And I did this, I did what he said to do, how to do
it. And for two months every night I’d go out there, completely patient. Most
people would get impatient, as I learned from friends that I told this about. I
told them how to do it, and they’d go out. And after 2 days they’d be calling
me all frustrated and stuff. So I would just tell them, ‘Well, come on over
here.’ And they would see them [aliens] too. And my roommate saw many things.
She was very skeptical. I wasn’t, I waited for 2 months and I just knew they
were going to come. And they did. They showed up.
And it was exciting because I
thought I was special. Later I was on YouTube looking. And there was a lot of
people that were trying really hard to do that. And it seemed like they would give
anything for that. And I just thought, ‘Wow. I’m really special.’ That’s not
what it is. It’s pretty easy to do. I would never suggest anybody ever do that
because there was some bad stuff that happened.
And so, yeah, they showed up.
Well one of them showed up. You know there was a big story to that too. A lot
of these experiences it just would take way too long to share them. But they
did [they came]. There was different ships—‘ships’—and one of them was like a blue spear.
And it seemed to have some attraction towards me. As far as, well it came
around this tree out here [pointing outside the apartment], and it came over my
head and just stayed there. And I was out front because I wanted to take a
better look at these things. And what was one that came by, the first one,
turned into like 5 of them out here. And they were all different and stuff. And
this blue one was right over my head, so I came back in, then went back out on
the deck, and it followed me over here. And these blue ones would follow me all
the time. So I sat there and I watched this blue thing right over my head until
the sun swallowed it up. And I came back in here. I got on YouTube and I found
a guy who was describing exactly what I had just seen. And by the way, when
these things showed up I did run in here—this was like 4 in the morning—I ran
in here and grabbed my roommate. Because I didn’t want to be sitting here telling
her this stuff and her going, ‘Yeah, right.’
So, once again, I found a guy
on YouTube, and he was, I couldn’t believe it, ‘Wow. This guy is telling me
what I just seen.’ So I commented on one of his videos telling him what had just
happened. And he, right then, he replied to me. And he said, ‘Oh, that’s just
the Arcturians and the Serians letting you know that they are real.’ And I’m
like, ‘Oh, well which one’s which?’ And I said specifically, ‘Which one is the
blue one?’ And he goes, ‘That’s the Arcturians.’ My roommate had showed up not
too long after that with a big box full of tons of books—New Age, and all sorts
of stuff, meditation, astral projection, and stuff like this. And one of them
was a book called, ‘We the Arcturians.’ And I read that book. And that’s when
I, from reading that book...pretty much the message was that—there’s a lot of
people that think this too. By the way I still have friends that are still
involved in this and they think this stuff too. And they are normal people.
They hold normal jobs. I know I probably don’t seem like I’m very normal, I don’t
know. But, I think I am [normal]. And they think that these aliens seeded
with man or something, or planted us. That’s...the teachings pretty much is
that. That’s what they teach. They teach that we came from them. This is a real
old teaching. This isn’t new. They say ‘New Age’, but New Age really isn’t new. They’ve
been doing this…You know the Egyptians, they said that gods came down—they
called them gods in fire ships, and stuff. Now these are the same things that I
seen. Same thing. Same teaching. Same everything. This has been around for ever. This isn’t new stuff. And it’s not
Star Wars. This is real. It’s just a [deception] of what it really is. And
that’s why I’m really doing this [testimony] too. It’s because it just needs to
be talked about more. I haven’t seen anything yet that’s gotten this deep into
a testimony for Jesus that’s quite this [detailed?], that would categorize as a
[detailed account of] contact like this with these [aliens-demons].
So anyway, so every night I’m
going outside, and I mean, it’s becoming…. there was more and more stuff going.
There’s so much going on. At the time I was sober. I was going to an out-patient
treatment. And I was going to these groups every week. And my counselors were
just, they were saying stuff like, ‘You’re, you are really doing well. We’re
amazed with your progress.’ And I really thought like, you know, because they [the New Age teachers] teach you all this stuff—raise your vibrations, and become an ascended master,
and they teach you that we’re all gods, and that we need to ascend from being a
human to like a god. And that if you don’t, [then] you have to come back and do
it over again and be a human being. And I remember thinking, ‘No way am I ever,
am I going to come back here and be a human being! Ever…no way!’ So it was
really important to me to ascend. It was, you know, there’s people on YouTube
and they call it their third eye, and all this stuff. It’s not your third eye.
It’s just I allowed, I asked them [the demons] to come into my life. So, I allowed spiritual
beings to basically bring me into their world. And then I was able to see
spiritual things. And they’re the ones that did that. They unlocked that
because I allowed it. And anyone can do it. There’s people that were on YouTube
begging for that kind of stuff. ‘Oh I need my third eye opened. I’d give
anything…’ No you wouldn’t. You wouldn’t want it.
I mean I’ve seen some stuff
that nobody...most people don’t believe it, that it’s true. And they’ll always
attribute it back to like drugs or something like that. ‘You fried your brain,
dude.’ Well when I was in this treatment, this out-patient, they found me
perfectly mentally stable. And one of the ways that they did this was, I kind
of slipped up in the meeting and I told them, ‘I’ve got some really interesting
things going on.’ Once a month you’d see a counselor and you’d sit on one-on-one
with them. And as soon as I got to my counselor once, he didn’t even say,
‘How’s your day? How are you doing?’ He just said, “All right. Let’s hear about
this. What’s going on with you?’ And I told him. And he said, ‘OK. We’re going
to set you up for mental evaluation.’ And the reason why is I was astral
projecting and I was meditating, and going into different dimensions—it’s a
demonic dimension. I didn’t know—having all kinds of experiences, the astral
projecting. I’ll just give you one little detail about that. Once I, you think
you’re leaving your body and all this stuff. And I went out into space, and I went
out there and there was a whole orchestra of instruments. Nobody playing them,
just the instruments. And I, with my mind, controlled this orchestra and made
this song with my mind. It was really, I’ll admit, it was amazing. And you
could tell it was my first time doing it because every once in a while the
music would stop. It was this song like I’ve never heard. And I was creating
it—or so I thought. It felt like it.
Stuff like that was going on.
I was meditating, and I mean, I didn’t even have to do it [meditate]. They say
you’ve got to lose your mind. Don’t think of anything and its going to take a
while. No, as soon as I close my eyes I’d be face to face with another being.
One time—this one’s crazy. One time I closed my eyes. And I am face to face
with the most beautiful, female…lizard? (Travis laughs). Yeah. And it was the
most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in my life. And it was a freakin’ lizard
woman, though. I mean, I don’t like lizards. I don’t think lizards look good. I’m
not attracted to lizards. But this one was beautiful. And she winked at me, and
she was sparkling. But she was like blue. And she was talking to me telepathically,
telling me that she was an Arcturian and that so was I, and stuff. And so I really
bought into this whole thing that I was an Arcturian. And I was continuing
going out every night, and having some crazy, crazy things happening. I’ll
share just a few of the things, just a few, because they get so crazy that probably
some of your guys who have some of the craziest stories would probably think, ‘It’s
crazy’.
Let’s see. OK. Gee, which one
do I want to talk about? I don’t even like talking about it. But, which one? I’ll
talk about a couple of bad things. I’d be outside and all of a sudden, man,
BOOM! this huge ship would be there. And what they called them was, they called
them ‘Light ships’ because they were pretty much just these lights. There was
other ones too. There was tons of them. And, anyway. I would get this
sensation. And I mean it felt real. I would swear it really was happening, that
they were sucking my soul out of my body. And mind you, I’m sober this whole
time. I’m completely sober. And it was easy to put…it would seem like I’m fighting
[to get my soul back], but I could put my soul back into my body. And when that
would happen, I would just come running, I mean I’d come running in here [the
apartment].
Another time I was sitting on
the couch over here. And somehow they had a way, because I allowed them. When
you allow them like this, you have a connection with them. You can tell when
they’re around, even when they are outside. One time I was just sitting there,
and I could tell one was coming up, like behind me, but, you know, outside. And
it came over my head and it [electrically?] shocked me. Now a lot of people talk
about being shocked like this from demons, and from these so called aliens. It
shocked me and then, right after that, something else was following it
afterwards. And not only was it…it [the next alien] shocked me and then I had
all this fear, panic, and then one went by and took all that away. And so I was
like, ‘What the ___ [expletive]?’ And so I went outside, I looked up and it was dark out.
But I could see these, they looked like chem-trails, two of them, totally
bizarre. And so I’m seeing all kinds of stuff, man. Ships of all kinds all the sudden…
I don’t want to go into that part….
Anyway, one time I seen, like,
I don’t know if it was the magnetic… Ok, the atmosphere is, there’s substance
there. You know, you learn about this in science, I think. That air in the
atmosphere has a substance to it. It’s like a magnetic pull or it’s, I don’t
know. But I seen it. It looked like a river. It looked like diagonal, all these
like lines going up. I was just like, ‘Whoa!’ you know. And I seen a bunch of
other things, a bunch, a bunch, a bunch of stuff. You know, a lot of times like
I would call my roommate, and she would see it too. We’d go on walks and see
them. They would come right over my head. Really got her scared, which I feel
bad about now. And you know, one time we went out to go for a walk, and I could
set my intentions for where I wanted them to show up, and they would. We’d get
out to this main road over here, and we’d take a right, and I just knew
something was going to be coming from the east. And all the sudden, and she saw
it, like I saw it, but she saw it first, and this huge light, I mean huge up in
the sky, coming right at us. She goes, ‘What the ___ is that?’, she goes. Actually
she said, ‘What the ___?’ And this thing came down and I mean it
was huge. No sound. OK, so I also told these things…I was so elated with the
fact that they showed up, and they’re giving me all of this attention, that I
told them…I said, ‘You can come in the house.’ And so things started happening
in here. I remember the first time my roommate, and mind you, believe me when I
say this, she had never seen anything like this. She was skeptical, very. Well
one time she’s like, ‘What are these things chasing the cats?’ And I had
already seen them, and stuff. In fact I even told her. I was like, ‘You know,
they are in the house.’ You know, because I would see them in all sorts of
different forms. I go, ‘Oh, don’t worry. It’s just the Arcturians, there. You
know they’re my family. It’s OK. And so anyway, I’m playing around with these
things and just having whatever, fun I guess. It just gets crazier, and crazier,
and crazier. There’s a…they looked holographic, hieroglyphs, like what’s on
the pyramid, floating around the house. All kinds of…it was…I really made a
mess. And I really thought it was spirit demons. Some crazy stuff happened. Let’s
just say that so we can get past this part.
In the meantime, all of a
sudden, my mom passed away. And then my cat, I ended up having to put my 3 year
old cat to sleep, which is another story in its own. And then, you know, I was
trying to tell my dad this stuff because we had seen those lights. And I could
tell he was like, ‘Oh man, my son he’s lost it. The drugs really got to him.’
And then he passed away. So it’s like everyone is passing away. My dad passed
away like 3 months [or] 4 months after my mom. And then in between that, I had to
put my cat to sleep for a unknown disease it had or something.
And then I got back on drugs
after my dad passed away. We were really close. Somebody just showed up. I was
really trying to stay away from that person. And it ended up they were here,
and it, it was just weird stuff happened because I was really trying to get
away from this guy. And he was even with somebody who wouldn’t allow that to
happen. And all the sudden they go, ‘I think I’m going to go down and check on
the dogs out in the car.’ And I’m like, ‘What? [puzzled]’ And they leave, and then my friend
gives me heroine. Friend? Yeah. So I’m back on these drugs, right? And as soon
as I take the drugs these things are out here, man. Like…I remember it scared
me. This scared me, and there was others things that scared me, too. I just
can’t talk about all of it. Because it would take forever. They really did look
like demons this time. I mean, why didn’t I think of it? Why didn’t I go, ‘This
isn’t good. They shocked me, they felt like they take my soul.’ One night I went
outside—and about 4 in the morning—and this metal ball was coming down. This
metal freakin’ ball, man. And a lot of times I’d go out there and some of them,
their intentions on me were so strong I’d come running in the house. And this
metal ball is coming down at me, and I was like thinking, ‘Don’t come any
closer! Don’t come any …!’ And it backed off. I mean it could feel me. It could
feel what I was going through. I would wake up in the middle of the night, with
a buzz going on, like ‘Bzzzzzzz’, and like shaking. I’d go to the window, the
sliding glass window and I’d see these crazy ships. Nothing else is buzzing and
shaking. Just these ships buzzing and shaking with me. I’d look at anything
else, and nothing else is doing that. So it was like they had me in tuned with
them. But they would also like telepathically tell me things, like, ‘This is
the people from Lyrica.’ They were like lion people, and stuff. It was just…I
don’t know, this is crazy.
So, this is not fun. Ok. So then,
we get into…so I got back into drugs. And they disappeared. They left. Now the
[New Age] teaching is that you have to have a pure mind, and all this. You
can’t be doing drugs. You can’t…you can’t really…it’s almost like obedience to Jesus,
what you got to do, which I know that sounds crazy. But, I wasn’t doing
anything before I relapsed. I was totally clean. I loved everybody, loved
animals. I wasn’t doing any sinning at all. I wasn’t cussing. I mean I wasn’t
doing nothing. Nothing sexual, nothing at all. And then, soon as I did the
drugs they disappeared. Well they showed up in here and they looked like
demons. And then they just disappeared. And I was sad, and I was like, ‘Oh, no!’
You know. ‘I screwed up!’
I had gotten a part of my
inheritance. And it was kind of a lot of money. And so I went hog wild, and I bought
a bunch of drugs. And I bought a truck and just stupid things. And ps-4, and stupid
___ [inhibited expletive?]. And I bought a ton of drugs. And I sat here and did
so much drugs that one day I laid down to take a nap. And I woke up with like alarms
going off , ‘You’ve got to go to the treatment now! You’ve got to go to detox right
now!’ And I was on so much drugs and I was on so much heroine, and I was on so
much anti-anxiety medication, that [to be detoxed] I had to go somewhere they don’t
take insurance. They only take cash. And it’s really expensive. I mean I had to
pay $12 grand [$12,000] for them to basically make sure I am alive for 8 days.
And then I went to treatment. I didn’t send myself in there. That wasn’t me.
That was God saying…that was God. And you know, I look back at that now and
know that it was because, you know, once you get to know Jesus and stuff, you
know how He is, and how He warns you and tells you things. And that was totally
Jesus right there. And so Jesus got me into detox. And when I got there they
found out, ‘You’re dying. Your body is shutting down.’ They almost had to put
me into the hospital. I was so lucky to get out of that. But I was sick because
I was coming off Suboxone, which it lasts a long time to get off. The
withdrawals are terrible. So are the anti-anxiety [pills], but more so because [they
were taken with] drugs, and that’s another whole story really, so I probably won’t
get into that. So I end up going to treatment and when I was there I couldn’t
stop thinking about my roommate. And something was telling me, ‘She’s going to
die. She’s going to die.’ And so really I couldn’t concentrate. I couldn’t concentrate
on the treatment. And plus, treatment doesn’t work. I don’t mean to say it,
like I’m not saying, ‘Don’t go to treatment’, if you need to go to treatment.
But faith-based is the best way. I didn’t know that at the time. So, anyway I go
to treatment, and all I can think about is my roommate and I got to get back.
So I pulled myself out of treatment and came back, worrying about her. So she
seemed fine and OK. And like I got here and I tried to be sober, and it didn’t
work. And I got back on drugs. And she didn’t know. She didn’t know.
Ok. Now it’s going to get
real controversial here. And I don’t even care if anyone even watches this
thing, which I don’t know [if anyone will]. And if there’s comments, ‘No. No, this can’t
happen!’ I don’t care. Go ahead, say what you want to say. I mean everybody has
a different path. And you know, you can’t put God in a box. Not everything is
in the word [of God]. Not everything is in the Bible. Not everything. I believe
the Bible 100%. And I’ll tell you why. But first, so I was back here and I remember
it was the worst winter I had in my entire life. And I remember I wanted to get
back, I called it ‘back to my spiritual[ity]’. I forgot what I called it. I just
called it ‘my spiritual’, but I wanted it back really bad. I remember when I was
in that treatment. I was sitting up in the room because I didn’t like being
around all those people [addicts who were going through detox]. And the roommate that I had [at the detox center], he comes up and says, ‘We
just watched a movie.’ And like I told him about all this stuff. And I go, ‘Really?
What was it about?’ And he goes, ‘It was about aliens.’ And I tell
him, ‘What? Why didn’t you tell me?’ And I go, ‘What was it about about
aliens?’ He goes, ‘That they are demons.’ I go, ‘Shut up!’ You know, I was like
ready to kick his butt. Because I hated when people said that. It really made
me angry. And that’s a testimony to how much I thought that they were my
family. And how much I loved them. I would defend them. And you know, it [aliens]
did change my life. And I thought there was purpose now in my life. But it
wasn’t enough. I was still doing drugs. It wasn’t enough obviously. And I really
never got a love feeling from these things.
So, anyway, I’m back here.
Back into drugs. And now we fast forward it a little bit. I feel like I’m
dying. I feel like I’m going to die from the drug use. And I probably was. And
so I was just like, ‘Oh well. I’m going to be with my Arcturians.’ But there
was a sadness to it. Oh, I forgot one very important thing, very important.
When I was going out there and having my encounters with the ships, (they were
in the house, I mean I just I don’t know why I liked to go out there and
have…there was a lot going on out there. But there was a lot going on in here too.
I was out there one day. This one gives me, some of these stories give me
chills. And I’m getting them [chills] right now. I’m sitting out there, waiting
on my ships, and all the sudden, (Ooh, I’m getting goose bumps) all the sudden
there’s a voice coming on my right side, my right ear, and it’s audible out
loud, I mean its just like you hear my voice now, it’s out loud, audible. And from
the first crack of the…it only said two words. And before it even said the
words, in my mind I go, ‘Jesus?’ And I say it again. I said, ‘Jesus?’ And it
was Jesus. I mean, they say to question the spirits. This was Jesus. Anyway…but,
you know, I didn’t question the spirit. But it was so powerful. I mean, I dealt
with these devils and demons and Satan. And this was different. I mean this
was…you know when you have a God encounter it’s so powerful. And He allowed me
to know it was Him. And He said. I mean I can’t say it like He did, He had just
a beautiful, beautiful voice. And the best I can do is, He said like this, it was
very gentle. But, I’ll tell you what else it was. He goes, ‘I’m coming.’ Wait.
It’s like [quieter], ‘I’m coming’. Like that. And when He said that, I could
feel 5 layers of sorrow. I felt some sorrow. It was intense sorrow. It was so
intense, I’ve never felt sorrow like that, but yet it wasn’t all of His sorrow.
And I knew that. But I could feel like 5 layers of it, like it was sorrow for
me, sorrow for the lost, sorrow for the world. It was indescribably. And it was
just in a split second. And I just remember going, ‘Jesus?’ That was Jesus, you
know. When I go out there, and I don’t go out on my deck to look for ships. I don’t
do that any more. When I go out there, I get goose bumps when I think about
that [Jesus speaking to him].
But, and then I…after that
happened, [when] I was like, ‘Is that [You] Jes…?’ I wasn’t like, ‘Is
that…[Jesus]?’ [Then I could have continued talking with Jesus so that my
thoughts might been that] I was like, ‘That was Jesus’. And [but], then
[instead I said], ‘OK. Where’s my ships?’ Hmm? [Travis laments discontinuing his communion with Jesus. It was him like saying, “What? What was I thinking? How could Arcturians compare with Jesus
and His multiple layers of sorrow?”] I told my roommate the next day, ‘Jesus
talked to me’. But I didn’t really…I can’t believe that I didn’t… And another
thing, when I was in the New Age and I was learning all of this stuff, they do talk
about Jesus. They do bring Jesus up. And this is what they say, and I remember
the day like it was yesterday. They say, you know, ‘Jesus is just another master,
you know, like Buddha or like, I don’t know. Who else is there? There’s tons of
them. I don’t care about them. And I remember I even said this out loud. I go…I
go, ‘No. I am going to choose to think that Jesus is more than just some
ascended master thing.’ And I said that, and I believe that, and I think that a
lot of that had to do with what happens coming up.
I do also remember this. One
day it just hit me, and I was like, ‘Jesus…’ And I asked Jesus...I go, ‘Jesus, if
there really is a hell, can You please let me know?’ Even though I had a demon
experience, duh [I should have known there is a hell]. ‘If there really is a
hell, can You let me know? And if there is I will really try to look into following
You. And I’ll try to do that.’ And then He said, ‘I’m coming.’ And that wasn’t
enough either. It was like [Travis looks back on his lack of faith and says to himself], ‘Hello dummy.’
So now, I had the worst
winter in my life. Now comes into spring, and all the sudden my roommate, who
had already had cancer once, goes in to the doctor and gets diagnosed with
cancer again. And, you know, she came home, and it was kind of like real
non-chalant. Like, ‘Oh, I’ve got cancer again. The cancer came back.’ And she just
looked and seemed so healthy. I had done tons of research from the first time
she had cancer. That doesn’t matter. You can do research. You know, there’s
cures and stuff like that. But then sometimes there’s not. Anyway, I think I’m
going to save her or something, and I start doing all of this research. And
then one day, probably a month after she said that that she got diagnosed with
cancer…[that] her cancer came back, [after] learning that radiation makes it
come back with a vengeance, [and] she hadn’t started any Chemo or anything like
this, she comes out here. I’ve stayed in the living room, this is a two bedroom
[apartment]. Her daughter was locked up for six months and then she went to an
Oxford House and stuff. So she never came back here. But they [the daughter’s
drug friends?] did, you know, they still hung out, they all hung out actually,
after a while…. So…. [Travis realizes the testimony is rambling] Gosh, this is
really long. I’m sorry. I haven’t even gotten to the good part.
So she [his roommate] comes out here. And she
was just sheet white. Like I said, with this apartment, I’ve always slept out
here in the living room on a…, at first it was a real terrible couch, now I’ve
got a really, really, nice big comfortable one. I just like…there’s a bed here,
but I sleep on this couch, out here still. She’s passed away over a year ago.
So she comes out, and she is just sheet, sheet white. That’s when [her cancer]
really hit me. Like, ‘Oh man.’ You know? It was devastating. I mean I loved her like
she was my mom. You know I had lost my mom, my dad, and now I’m looking at her
and I’m going, ‘Dude, now I’m going to lose you now, huh?’ And it was like all
the weight in the world was on me. I felt like I had to find a treatment for
her.
So, when that happened, a family
member of hers just showed up out of the blue. And I seen her like that and [she]
said, ‘Where is your key? I’m going to get a copy.’ Well, my roommate had told
me a lot of stories about this woman. And when my roommate’s mother died, this
family member of my roommate’s who came and got the key, cleaned her [his roommate’s mother] out for
everything she had. And she leaves to make a spare, made another key made, and I
go, ‘You’re sure you want [to let her open access to the apartment?], you know…’ and she even didn’t feel good about it at
all at first. So anyway, I’ve got all this weight on my shoulders of I’ve got
to find an alternative for my roommate, you know, to get through this cancer.
By then they said, ‘It’s in her bones. It’s in her brain. It’s just everywhere.’
I really didn’t understand. One of her family members had to come to me and
say, ‘She’s not going to make it’, you know, ‘She can’t make it.’ And so I tried to
tell my roommate. And I said, ‘Well then look, let’s just skip the Chemo because
that’s just going to wipe you out. That’s just going to take you out sooner. There’s
just no reason…’ She was declining so fast. And, OK so here is where it’s going
to get controversial. Like it hasn’t been already.
OK, here is where people are
going to say, ‘No. No. No. No. No.’ But I’m just going to stand up right now
and I’m going to say something that a lot of people don’t agree with. And I’ve
seen a couple [of]…not very many, two, who would agree with me because they
experienced this. And that is this: you really can’t put a…you really
shouldn’t, I know in scripture it says, you know, I don’t really know [where the verse is]. OK,
we’re dealing with the Holy Spirit here. And of course when you’re dealing with
the Holy Spirit you have to be very careful. And I always try to be. You don’t
want to say something that’s not truth of the Holy Spirit. But I’m going to say
this. This is what happened to me. So one night, all this is going on with my
roommate. I lay down to go to sleep. I’m a drug addict. I’m a sinner. I did ask
Jesus if, you know, if He can tell me if hell is real, then I would look into Jesus.
I was very scared of hell. But I was also arguing with other family members who
have been in the faith for 30+ years, and we were arguing, and my argument is
that there is no hell. There is no hell. I absolutely would not believe there
is a hell.
So, anyway, I go to sleep one
night, and I wake up. This, this is one of most important moments of my entire
life. I go to sleep. I wake up in the morning. Usually it takes me a long time
to wake up in the morning. Plus I was a drug addict. Had to take my drugs, you
know, [or] I’m [usually] not awake. No, this morning when I woke up I was wide awake. And I
got up. And I sat straight up out of bed and I grabbed my heart. I could just
feel…there is something going on here. And I said it out loud twice. I said, ‘I
am not content with my beliefs. I am not content with my beliefs.’ And the next
thing you know there’s something talking to me from my heart. It wasn’t
audible. It was telepathic like. But I could hear the words. And I didn’t know
at the time that it was the Holy Spirit. And the Holy Spirit said these exact
words. It was almost like It…like He pointed to where He wanted me to look in
the first. But, I…there…He wasn’t pointing. He was in my heart.. But, [He] directed
my attention out to the deck, and said this, and said, ‘Those things you been
messing with out there are demons.’ And then it directed me to like right here
in the center of the room like, or something. Because I turned, It said, He said,
‘Hell is real.’ And then this here is kind of a cool thing. That Bible that I had,
I think I showed it (I got a Bible for mark[ing]…yeah, I showed it). Then it turned
my attention over here, to there’s a table, well actually it was this chair
here. And I used to keep my…well my Bible was in the bathroom. But, all of a
sudden, it’s on this chair. And then it said, ‘Everything in that Bible is 100%
true.’ As the Holy Spirit told me this stuff there was no…when the Holy Spirit
said these things to me, there was no argument. It was as if as soon as the Holy
Spirit said these things, I instantly didn’t just believe, but I knew that I knew
that I knew. And I think about that [experience with the Holy Spirit] every single day of my life. And I love
that [experience with the Holy Spirit] every single day of my life.
And then…, this is crazy
here. After the Holy Spirit said that to me, there was this feeling in my gut.
Now a lot of people say that’s where the soul is. Well that’s where I felt this
next presence. And this wasn’t the Holy Spirit. The only, I mean. This is, OK. It
was like a remnant of God. It was like a remnant of God. And it just started
rumbling inside of me down here. And it started yelling at me. And it said
this...OK, my roommate’s room is right over here [pointing to his right]. And it
directed me to the wall, which on the other side of this wall is my roommate. ‘NOW
GO IN THERE AND TALK TO HER ABOUT JESUS. NOW!’ Over and over and over,
yelling at me like that. And if you can, and, all I…. It’s like, I knew what it
was. I didn’t know it was in my heart. I didn’t know that was the Holy Spirit. This
is going to get real weird. I just…it felt like a piece of God, like God just
threw a little piece of Himself in me, like a, kind of like a wrath. Kind of
like a really mad father. And I remember saying to that, ‘You know, hold on. I will.’ I can’t even believe I said that. And
of course, I was going to. I was going to anyway, but…and I have to say—and by
the way, it was in me for two weeks yelling at me while I was going in there
and then talking to her about Jesus. But, like I was so, it was so urgent, and
you’ll find out why it was so urgent. This is insane. But it’s beautiful. So of
course I went in there and talked to her about Jesus. And at this time also, in
my heart there was a bubbling, like, not real ones, but I would swear. I mean I’d
even look down to look and expect to see bubbles coming out of my heart.
That went on for two months, the
bubbling. And so I called my cousin, who I was really close with him. He was
around my age. He was one that I was arguing with about hell. And I mean, they
never thought that I would be a believer or anything. And I called him, and he
came right over. I mean he was coming here every single day. And [I] kept telling
him, ‘It’s like truth. It’s like this truth. And it’s bubbling.’ Well, he
wouldn’t say any[thing]. I’m like asking him, ‘What is this?’ you know, ‘Help
me out here.’ ‘I don’t know, Trav.’ And the reason he said that, its very
controversial. It’s because a lot of believers don’t think…, ‘No. You couldn’t
have gotten the Holy Spirit. You couldn’t have.’ And that did become a problem,
which I will go into. So I was calling priests, and my family who were
believers, over here to anoint here, to talk to her, and everything else. I thought
I was going to have to find someone to do it because I didn’t think that God
gave me the authority. He actually, He actually wanted me to do it. Which I understand,
but I wasn’t getting through to her at all. You know, I was the alien guy, and
now [a] Jesus freak. But you know everything like I told her about the aliens and
stuff, she saw. She didn’t go through close to [as many of] the experiences that I did. But,
she couldn’t deny it. And neither could friends that I’d have come over. And
then they’d go home, and then they’d have aliens, which I, in the end of that, I
feel terrible about that. Thank God they got out of it, and they are actually
Christians.
Anyway, after…and I’m doing
that with my roommate, and right away, day one, I’m calling my friends and
family. And I’m just saying, ‘I just want you to know that I’ve asked Jesus to
be my Lord and Saviour. So I’m doing everything I can to get my roommate saved,
I guess. Well, God’s doing it, I’m not doing anything. He wanted her, and He
was going to get her.
There was a continual yell
going on for two weeks straight, ‘GET IN
THERE AND TALK TO HER ABOUT JESUS. NOW!’ That’s like the nice version. It was,
it was really authoritive [authoritative]. I mean it was really a lot like what
people say who had experiences with God in a way of where He is very
authoritive. I actually really loved it. I loved it. I could have lived with
it. I mean, nobody likes to get yelled at. But for some reason, I just I got
used to it real quick. And I loved it, and it was almost like kind of getting
to know God. It was really, I’ve never had an experience like this...like that.
And I really just innocently fell in love with God from Him yelling at me.
Plus, His interest in my friend, my roommate, was my interest. And I wanted her
to be saved, just as bad as He did. It really was my number one priority. I was
giving her an alternative medication. And with all the [other] medication she
was on I had to really research to what I could give her that wouldn’t affect
the other medications that she was on. Like, you know, side effects. I didn’t...we didn’t want any side effects. We didn’t want anything to contrast with the
medication that she was on. And I did know a bit about medicine. I was a med
tech and stuff for a long time. So that helped.
But, like I said, I had a
bunch of people coming in here, trying to talk to her about Jesus. And, you
know, after the Holy Spirit came into my heart, and it was there so strongly, Holy
Spirit taught me a lot. And like I didn’t know much at all about the Bible. And
the Holy Spirit just like instan…like I don’t know when it happened, if I was
asleep when I happened. But Holy Spirit, it was like a puzzle coming together
for me. Now I don’t claim to know all scripture or anything like that. I don’t because
I’ve only been a believer now for just ov…a little over a year. But, I mean, it
was like a crash course. And I understood things in the Bible that I had no
idea…I didn’t even know what the Holy Spirit was. In fact I still didn’t know
that I had the Holy Spirit. I didn’t know, but I was asking questions. But I was
mostly yap, yap, yap. I just couldn’t stop talking about God. I couldn’t stop
talking about Jesus.
And I was also being warned…this was all going on the same time I’m trying to have, you know, I’m helping God
with my roommate. And I’m also being warned that some sort of destruction is
going to happen on the earth. And it was scary. It was like, I was like chicken
little running around, ‘The sky is falling the sky is falling.’ And I was
telling this to everybody. I was telling this to my family that had been
believers for a long time. And they thought I was nuts—some of them. I mean
they were really glad, they were really happy, you know.
I was also going through a lot of turmoil. I was still on drugs. I was still using drugs. You know, that day the Holy Spirit came into my heart and told me, ‘Those things you’re messing with are demons. Hell is real. And the Bible is all truth.’ And then I’ll never forget this. This is so sick. I look down at my drugs right after that and I said, (because I knew), ‘That means I’m going to have to quit drugs, huh.’ Holy Spirit was really awesome. Because It said those things, those three things and It had already instilled all this stuff in me. Like the Bible, repentance. I didn’t know a thing about repentance. I didn’t even think I really knew what repentance…I’d had no idea about [what] repentance really was. I don’t even think I knew what the word was. And so I just knew. And I knew it was something I had to do. Holy Spirit was so—I’m trying think of the word, not lenient. Understanding and patient with me. I mean extremely. You don’t hear this very often. I know people don’t hear this very often of, ‘Yeah, the Holy Spirit…’ And it was also telling me stuff like, ‘There are things in this house that you need to get rid of.’ I was an owl collector. Like I collected owls and stuff. It took me probably…it’s taken me a year to really clean out everything in this apartment, to get rid of everything, I mean everything.
I was also going through a lot of turmoil. I was still on drugs. I was still using drugs. You know, that day the Holy Spirit came into my heart and told me, ‘Those things you’re messing with are demons. Hell is real. And the Bible is all truth.’ And then I’ll never forget this. This is so sick. I look down at my drugs right after that and I said, (because I knew), ‘That means I’m going to have to quit drugs, huh.’ Holy Spirit was really awesome. Because It said those things, those three things and It had already instilled all this stuff in me. Like the Bible, repentance. I didn’t know a thing about repentance. I didn’t even think I really knew what repentance…I’d had no idea about [what] repentance really was. I don’t even think I knew what the word was. And so I just knew. And I knew it was something I had to do. Holy Spirit was so—I’m trying think of the word, not lenient. Understanding and patient with me. I mean extremely. You don’t hear this very often. I know people don’t hear this very often of, ‘Yeah, the Holy Spirit…’ And it was also telling me stuff like, ‘There are things in this house that you need to get rid of.’ I was an owl collector. Like I collected owls and stuff. It took me probably…it’s taken me a year to really clean out everything in this apartment, to get rid of everything, I mean everything.
Also with my roommate when I would
go in there, finally I had exhausted all my outside help, that I would call in
here to talk to her…. My cousin came in, and did get her [his roommate] to cry
once. And I was like, let them be in there alone. And I came out here and then
I would like peak in around the corner. I saw her crying, and I was like,
‘Yes!’ But that didn’t do nothing because I could see in her eyes and I could
see in other people’s eyes that…I could tell that she didn’t quite have faith,
complete faith. And I could also tell that she had resentment and that she had [need
of?] repentance. And so we went through all that. It got really frustrating,
though. There was times that I was going in there like a drill sergeant, saying,
‘You will believe in Jesus now!’, you
know. That didn’t work. But, we just, we chipped away and there was a
particular person, and I don’t want to say who this person is, that she had a
problem with. And it was really my fault, because I, through[out] our time here, I would
be talking about this person, and not in a good way. You know, this person
didn’t have good intentions towards me. It was a very close family member. And
so, and that’s another reason that God was yelling at me. It’s because you
know, I got her to resent somebody. I brought in these stupid demons, I taught
her about New Age, you know. She was starting to believe in it. So, yeah, God
was mad at me, and had a good reason to be. I was mad at myself.
So anyway I could tell by…her eyes, I could tell from…everywhere I’d go for the two months—well it
lasted even longer than that but—I could tell for awhile people from far
distance if they were believers or not. I wasn’t told everything at all. I was
only given a little…enough that I could handle, I guess. I mean, it was a lot
to handle. I look back at it now and I just laugh because, wow that was a lot
to deal with, you know. My family dies, and now my best friend is dying. And I’m
trying to cure her and save...help God to save her. I mean God could have did
it on His own. But, you know, there was a reason why He did this. And I think
it was not just for me and her, it was for other people, too. It was for family
members, friends, and hopefully it still continues. That it can continue to
help anybody.
So, little did I know that in
this two weeks that God was yelling at me that my roommate would lose her
mental capability of really being able to repent fully and accept Jesus
and ask Jesus to be her Lord and Saviour.
And finally, and I’m trying to think because there was a lot of stuff that was
going on at the time. I was really battling, and I was going crazy. I would
have to come out into the outside or the kitchen, and I’d be just, I was just
torn. And I finally, this was the first time I ever asked Jesus for anything. I
said, ‘Jesus, Jesus please give me strength. I need strength.’ And it came over me like a, like a, like a, just
over my head and really like, like, like warm water or something over my whole
body, it just came upon me this str...this unbelievable strength. I was saying
stuff like, I remember I was in her room, and here she is just dying. And I patted
her on the leg and said, ‘This is what’s going on here with you. This is OK.’
And people are looking at me, ‘What?’ And I’m laughing and I’m happy and I’m
feeling guilt. I can’t even feel bad if I tried. I’m feeling guilt. I’m like, ‘Oh
my gosh, stop laughing. Stop being so happy! This is not a time to be happy.’
You know, God wanted her. God wanted her now. And He was going to have her. And
I never knew any of this stuff. I never knew that God could want somebody so
bad that He’s just going to have her...have that person. And He was going to
have her. And so I know I’m missing a lot of stuff here.
So I go into here room one
night. And it’s just her TV was on. And there was a lot of stuff that I…I had
to throw some things away and she didn’t like that. But Holy Spirit was telling
me to do it. And she hated [to lose] that stuff. Before all this happened, you just
didn’t go throwing away any of her stuff. You would hear from her, man.
So one night I go in there…. And also like the prayers, I’ve…she would call me in there to prayer and to read the Bible, and when we would pray, it was not even me. Like I can’t pray. I’m not a good pray-er. But these were beautiful prayers. I mean these were just beautiful. And when we’d be done she would go, ‘That was really beautiful.’ And I would just go, [pointing his finger up to God] ‘It’s not me’. So any way, I go in there one night, and it’s dark in there, and she’s laying on her bed, just whatever she’s doing. She’s content. But I can see it in her eys, and I’m looking in her eyes and thinking, ‘There’s something [not right].’ So I cross my arms and I look at her, and she’s not looking at me. And I go, ‘We’re missing something.’ Now I…I…that choice of words right there, that was God. God put that in my mouth because that just happened to be the blessing. And when I said, ‘We’re missing something here,’ she turned over to me, and she looked at me like, ‘How did you know?’ And she starts balling, I mean balling. And this woman I’ve seen her on her deathbed two other times before this. She had [been cold and self-dependent?]...except this once. And [each time] she was supposed to die, but she made it. [Now] she just started crying. She looked up and she said, ‘Jesus please be my Lord and Saviour, and I repent for the sin of abortion.’ She never told a soul about this abortion. She didn’t tell nobody, not even her daughter. I was surprised when we told her daughter and stuff, that her daughter didn’t like get angry, and say, ‘No, that’s a lie.’ I think she asked her [about the abortion?].
So one night I go in there…. And also like the prayers, I’ve…she would call me in there to prayer and to read the Bible, and when we would pray, it was not even me. Like I can’t pray. I’m not a good pray-er. But these were beautiful prayers. I mean these were just beautiful. And when we’d be done she would go, ‘That was really beautiful.’ And I would just go, [pointing his finger up to God] ‘It’s not me’. So any way, I go in there one night, and it’s dark in there, and she’s laying on her bed, just whatever she’s doing. She’s content. But I can see it in her eys, and I’m looking in her eyes and thinking, ‘There’s something [not right].’ So I cross my arms and I look at her, and she’s not looking at me. And I go, ‘We’re missing something.’ Now I…I…that choice of words right there, that was God. God put that in my mouth because that just happened to be the blessing. And when I said, ‘We’re missing something here,’ she turned over to me, and she looked at me like, ‘How did you know?’ And she starts balling, I mean balling. And this woman I’ve seen her on her deathbed two other times before this. She had [been cold and self-dependent?]...except this once. And [each time] she was supposed to die, but she made it. [Now] she just started crying. She looked up and she said, ‘Jesus please be my Lord and Saviour, and I repent for the sin of abortion.’ She never told a soul about this abortion. She didn’t tell nobody, not even her daughter. I was surprised when we told her daughter and stuff, that her daughter didn’t like get angry, and say, ‘No, that’s a lie.’ I think she asked her [about the abortion?].
It was amazing. That was the
most profound thing, even more so than (I could just about cry) more so than
when the Holy Spirit came into my heart. I loved her so much, (I don’t want to
start crying), and that was the…OK, so she did that. And I got up, and it
wasn’t even me that said, ‘You know what? Your Lord and Saviour can raise the
dead. And He took your sin of abortion and threw it as far to the east as the,
east goes, whatever that is. Sorry [for misquoting that verse].
And then that yelling that
was going on, said, ‘Now get out of here!’ Because you’d think that right now is a ‘high
five’ moment. This was a big hug moment. I think this was her time to be with
the Lord. Because it was like God said, ‘All right, now get out of here.’ Like,
‘We’re done with you. Get!’ And so I come out here. And I get
on my couch. And I lay back. And I can feel what was in me here [his lower
abdomen] come right up out, and out right off of my head. And up it goes. And I
looked up and I said, ‘So, I guess we’re done, God. I guess we got the job
done, right God?’ And it was kind of like a, that when God was in there yelling
at me, it was like a...I called it like ‘a beautiful burden.’ And it just
released out of me. And it was such a moment because He really did put a burden
on me. Even though I loved it. That’s why I called it a ‘beautiful burden.’ That
was great, man. And then you know what? She started losing her mental faculties
there, and [Jesus saved her] just in time.
And so, there was a lot of,
there was some problems going on with the family that was coming in here and
stuff (which I really don’t’ want to get into that), and they had a key and
stuff, to our place. And they just come and go as they please. I was watching
Cheryl for 20 hours, and then they’d come in 4 [p.m.]. I was wore out. Before
they even started to do that, I was doing everything for her for a month before
that all happened. So I mean I was just wiped out. I don’t even know how I made
it. She also had a stint in the hospital. It was tough.
So, she was...by this time hospice
had come in. (And I can’t believe I’m going to have to do another one) [another video to finish this testimony. Maybe he’s afraid of boring us. He has nothing to worry about there]. So hospice was in here, and they were great. Gosh, I don’t want
to leave anything out [of this testimony], there was so much that was going on
here. It was actually exciting. Now that strength that I asked Jesus, I asked
Him for that strength, and it was just amazing strength. It finally went away after
a week and, and I was all puny again.
But, I carried on, and
carried through. My roommate’s last wishes, and she told this probably 3 years
prior to her passing, was for me to hold her hand when she passed away. So I wanted
to make sure and that she told the family, and everything like that. We also
wanted her daughter to be there for that. Her daughter was having some
problems. And her daughter actually had to move away. And we all agreed on that
that she move. And I think that was a great decision, actually. Because she [his roommate?] had
been through a lot, and this was really her only family that she had any
interactions with, and stuff. So, it kind of turned out sad, you know, but....
So, a lot is going on, a lot
of stuff. I was pretty much stuck here. I couldn’t go anywhere, which is fine
with me. So, during the…I’d go to sleep around 10 a.m. and get up around 1
[p.m.]. Well I’m sleeping one day (this is really hard to even go through
again) and I’m awakened, and I sit up and they are taking my roommate out of
here. And they are bringing her to hospice. That was the last time I seen her
conscious. And you know, that was really sad, really sad to see because she had
suffered so much. She was suffering so much, and it was horrible. I can’t even
imagine what she went through. But, so she went to hospice, and we met with the
doctor who’s there and he said, ‘She’s not going to make it through the night.’
I hadn’t even slept. I mean I was a basket case. So I talked to the nurses and
stuff, and everybody in the family. And they said [I said], ‘Look, look I’ve
got to go at least try to get a half an hour, or something, of sleep. So if…if…they
know when she’s going to be passing. They know. They’re professionals, more so
than a hospital. So, you call me well in advance when you know she’s going.’
So I get here and just lay my
head down, and the phone rings. So, I’m going back over to the hospice. And,
yeah, this part it gets kind of crazy here too. So I get to the hospital and
it’s her time [to pass]. And, she’s…her eyes are closed and stuff. And I’m
trying to talk her into letting go. And she’s trying to hold on, hold on. Her
daughter has just left [from Texas?]. This is probably 500 miles away; there’s
no way she can make it here in time, you know.. and I’m holding her hand, just talking to her real gentle. There was a chaplain there
who came in a day before. And she said, ‘Whoa, I feel the Holy Spirit coming!’
She’s the only person...I was like, ‘Really? Holy Spirit?’ I didn’t know I had
the Holy Spirit.
So I held her hand. She
passed on. I could definitely feel a weird sensation in the room as she, as she
did pass. In fact I know it. It was….it was strange. Somebody wasn’t very happy
and I’ll tell you who they weren’t happy with. They weren’t happy with me. And
I remember soon as I was done, I went outside and go on the phone and I called
my aunt and uncle. And they’re very strong in faith and I told them what
happened. And they cut off on the phone. I could hear them, however, but they
couldn’t hear me. And I could hear my aunt, see my aunt was on one phone, and
then my uncle was on another. They were on landline phones. And my aunt goes,
‘He’s going to get attacked!’ And I call them back and go, ‘Oh, and by the way, I’m
not going to get attacked. Tsss.’ The attacks started that night, and they were
ruthless. And it was through other people they were sent. And I fought with the
family. It was so terrible, it was so bad the next day I went and I got a
friend. I went and picked a friend up and he stayed with me for two weeks. It
got to a point where he had to take care of me. And he couldn’t believe it. He
was, his family was Jehovah’s Witnesses, and he wasn’t much of a believer or
anything. Well he was after this. He couldn’t believe what was going on. It got
to a point where after a week and a half (and I was smoking cigarettes at the
time. Can you believe this?) and I hadn’t had a cigarette maybe 4 hours. And so
I’m like, ‘I got to go outside and have a cigarette. I’ve been just battling.’
I go out on the deck and my deck’s on fire, you know. I froze in my exist[ence?]…
my friend had to put the fire out.
But, I was talking about how
the Holy Spirit warned me. The Holy Spirit really warned me. I mean there was a
time when like I went outside once. And like there was a breeze coming. And the
breeze was like telling me, you know, ‘Jesus is coming. There’s going to be destruction
on earth.’ All this stuff. I mean crazy, crazy stuff. And then It was telling
me about some sort of deception that the ‘aliens’ are going to have something
to do with antichrist, and all this stuff. I’m not going to get too much into
that. There’s a lot of stuff that I didn’t get into [didn’t cover in this
YouTube testimony]. It doesn’t need to be. I don’t think it…I don’t know. Maybe
another video…
So I did end up quitting
drugs. I did quit everything. I finally learned that obedience is key. And for
some reason, for a long time there, for almost a year, I had this little
problem with Jesus. And it wasn’t Jesus’ fault. You know, I think it was just,
I was being attacked a lot. Satan was not happy with what happened with my
roommate. He was very not happy. And I was doing stup…like I was like
challenging Satan and stuff. I was saying stuff like, ‘How could you be so
stupid to think you can overtake the throne of God?’, you know. And then I would
just get viciously, like through dreams, you know. I would be fighting against
demons. And he really would…how Satan attacks me is through other people. And I
struggled with the drugs. You know, the Holy Spirit stuck in there with me. And,
you know, I can’t say enough for the Holy Spirit. How the Holy Spirit can stay
with you. Over this year He has helped to shape me and trim me. You know, God
took everything away from me. Everything. All my friends. Almost all my
possessions. I mean I was lucky to even keep my apartment here. I didn’t have a
job. You know, I was still battling drugs still. Took everything, though. He
even took my…my electricity. I seriously had nothing but a Bible. And I’m just
so glad. I’m just so happy. I’m so grateful. You know, I always used to say, ‘I
want to die. I want to die now.’ I’m just so glad. I know this isn’t the best
place to be. But I’m just so glad and I’m so grateful to have…so blessed to have this breath that I’m
taking right now. And I praise God every day, and I say, ‘Thank You. Thank You
Lord, so much. And thank You for this day.’
I’ve talked to all my friends
and family about the things that the Holy Spirit has warned me about. It wasn’t
popular at all, even with believers in my family, you know. I was telling people
in my family, ‘Hey, you know, you should get off that anti-depressant.’ [Their
response was,] ‘Well over here in scripture, Trav, it says that….’ [Travis’
answer,] ‘You know you should go to Jesus for help.’ I got off everything [all drugs] pretty much like at once. I got off anti-anxieties, and heroine, and just a
mess of drugs. And He really is the way. Jesus is the way with everything. Not
just [for] salvation. He can do everything for you. And He will if you seek
Him. Obedience. And it really came down to that with me was the obedience
because I knew all these people who claimed Jesus, but yet they thought, ‘Oh we
can still do drugs.’ And I was, ‘No.’ I remember there was a guy where he was here
for like three days (and, you know, I was doing drugs too), but my whole thing to
him was we had this debate for three days to where he finally just goes (to
imitate his friend Travis drops his head and mumbles), ‘Obedience’. I was like,
‘Yeah. Obedience.’ Obedience is not a work. It is a…it’s a commandment. And if
we love Jesus, we will, we will obey Him. No, we’re not perfect. You’ve got to
stay repentive [repentant], and work with Him. And He will reveal Himself, you
know.
And I’ve had some really neat
experiences with Jesus, some really neat ones. We’ve played together. You know,
I mean…. It was kind of a vision, dream. I was like half awake, half asleep.
And when I was a kid I always loved rolling down this grassy hill. Well, me and
Jesus were embraced and we were rolling down this hill. And I was just saying,
‘I love you Jesus. I love you Jesus.’ And my roommate came out and was like, ‘You
all right?’ [Travis laughs]. But you know, and I’ve had some really good
experiences. And I’m really happy today. I’ve got so much energy, and just joy.
And I used to be really reclusive. And there was a woman that lived downstairs.
And she had in her window [a sign], ‘Jesus Lord’. I used to come by and mock
that thing, ‘Jesus is Lord!!’ And I never
talked with her. And after the Holy Spirit came into my heart, my roommate was
in the hospital. And I come down and she [the woman downstairs] was coming, she
was in a wheelchair. And she was coming by, and she could tell… she said, later
on she said, ‘Oh, I could tell the minute I seen your face, your eyes, you know,
what had happened.’ And I just loved her. She ended up moving, but…. This has
been, like I said earlier, this last 4 years more has happened to me than in my
whole 46 years of living. And it’s all because of Jesus. You never know what
path you are going to have. People are always arguing and bickering about ‘works’
and against ‘grace’, and all this and all that, and ‘the rapture’. Yeah, I believe
in the rapture. But I’m not just going to come out and say, ‘I’m pre-trib or
post-trib rapture’. I know Jesus is coming. I know He is. So we should just stay
prepared as if He was going to come right now. And I am grateful to be able to,
you know, just testify for Jesus. So, yeah. And I am very happy now. And I just
plan on getting happier. And I plan on becoming more what God wants me to be.
And you know when you really love Jesus and you really, really, really keep
seeking and seeking Him, you can’t lose. And things are just going to get
better.
You know, times get hard
still, and they will. But, just don’t stop, don’t ever stop, no matter what.
Don’t let your sins drag you down. Don’t let the devil take you down with that
sin. As long as we’re breathing we got Jesus. You have to stay on it, don’t
backslide. Don’t slip away from Him. Stay. And, you know, that’s one thing that
I’ve learned right there, is I’m not going to beat myself up if I fall. I’m
just going to immediately get back up, because not only do I love Jesus, I don’t
want to go to hell. Anyway, I hope that this helped somebody. I don’t know. I’m
just…like I said, I’m grateful to be able to share and to know Jesus. And a
dream that I had here recently was Jesus’ confirming that I know Him. And then I
said, ‘Well, You know me too, right?’
posted by David | 4:58 AM
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