Mississippi Squirrel Revival
Well when I was a kid I would take a trip
Every summer down to “Mississipp,”
To visit my Granny and her antebellum world.
I’d run barefooted all-day long,
Climbing trees free as a song;
One day I happened to catch myself a squirrel.
Well I stuffed him down in an old shoe box,
And punched a couple holes in the top;
When Sunday came I snuck him in the Church.
I was sittin’ way back on the very last pew
Showin’ ’im to my good buddy Hugh,
When that squirrel got loose and went totally berserk.
Well what happened next is hard to tell;
Some thought it was Heaven others thought it was Hell,
But the fact that something was among us was plain to see.
As the choir sang “I Surrender All,”
The squirrel ran up Harv Newman’s coveralls,
And Harv leaped to his feet and said, “Something’s got a hold on me!”
The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula.
It was a fight for survival
That broke out in revival.
They were jumpin’ pews and shoutin’ “Hallelujah!”
Well Harv hit the aisles dancin’ and screamin’,
Some thought he had religion others thought he had a demon,
And Harv thought he had a weed-eater loose in his Fruit-of-the-Looms.
He fell to his knees to plead and beg,
And the squirrel ran out of his britches leg;
Unobserved to the other side of the room.
All the way down to the AMEN pew,
Where sat Sister Bertha Better-than-You,
Who had been watching all of the commotion with sophistic glee.
But shoot, you should have seen the look in her eyes
When that squirrel jumped her garters and crossed her thighs.
And she jumped to her feet and said, “Lord have mercy on me!”
As that squirrel made laps inside her dress
She began to cry and then to confess,
To sins that would make a sailor blush with shame.
She told of gossip, and church dissention,
But the thing that got the most attention
Was when she talked about her love life
and then she started naming names.
The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula.
It was a fight for survival that broke out in revival.
They were jumpin’ pews and shoutin’ “Hallelujah!”
Well seven deacons and the pastor got saved,
And twenty-five thousand dollars got raised,
And fifty volunteered for missions in the Congo on the spot.
And even without an invitation
There were at least five hundred re-dedications,
and we all got re-baptized whether we needed it or not.
Now you’ve heard the Bible story I guess
Of how He parted the waters for Moses to pass.
Oh the Miracles God has wrought in this old world.
But the one I’ll remember till my dying day
Is how He put that church back on the narrow way
With a half crazed Mississippi squirrel.
The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula.
It was a fight for survival
That broke out in revival.
They were jumpin’ pews and shoutin’ “Hallelujah!”
(Ray Stevens)
I realize this song was a spoof on religion, but it was done in good humor, and we should be able to take a little ribbing for all our self-righteousness. (Beside that, it was also quite comical.) But don’t you wish sometimes that this story could happen in your church just to give the people an idea of what true religion and real revival could be like?
Actually, I don’t believe true revival would be characterized by all the jumping pews and such. Rather, there will be a new infusing of life into the love and witness of the people and a decided overturning of dissention and the chilling atmosphere so often existing in the churches.
Every summer down to “Mississipp,”
To visit my Granny and her antebellum world.
I’d run barefooted all-day long,
Climbing trees free as a song;
One day I happened to catch myself a squirrel.
Well I stuffed him down in an old shoe box,
And punched a couple holes in the top;
When Sunday came I snuck him in the Church.
I was sittin’ way back on the very last pew
Showin’ ’im to my good buddy Hugh,
When that squirrel got loose and went totally berserk.
Well what happened next is hard to tell;
Some thought it was Heaven others thought it was Hell,
But the fact that something was among us was plain to see.
As the choir sang “I Surrender All,”
The squirrel ran up Harv Newman’s coveralls,
And Harv leaped to his feet and said, “Something’s got a hold on me!”
The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula.
It was a fight for survival
That broke out in revival.
They were jumpin’ pews and shoutin’ “Hallelujah!”
Well Harv hit the aisles dancin’ and screamin’,
Some thought he had religion others thought he had a demon,
And Harv thought he had a weed-eater loose in his Fruit-of-the-Looms.
He fell to his knees to plead and beg,
And the squirrel ran out of his britches leg;
Unobserved to the other side of the room.
All the way down to the AMEN pew,
Where sat Sister Bertha Better-than-You,
Who had been watching all of the commotion with sophistic glee.
But shoot, you should have seen the look in her eyes
When that squirrel jumped her garters and crossed her thighs.
And she jumped to her feet and said, “Lord have mercy on me!”
As that squirrel made laps inside her dress
She began to cry and then to confess,
To sins that would make a sailor blush with shame.
She told of gossip, and church dissention,
But the thing that got the most attention
Was when she talked about her love life
and then she started naming names.
The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula.
It was a fight for survival that broke out in revival.
They were jumpin’ pews and shoutin’ “Hallelujah!”
Well seven deacons and the pastor got saved,
And twenty-five thousand dollars got raised,
And fifty volunteered for missions in the Congo on the spot.
And even without an invitation
There were at least five hundred re-dedications,
and we all got re-baptized whether we needed it or not.
Now you’ve heard the Bible story I guess
Of how He parted the waters for Moses to pass.
Oh the Miracles God has wrought in this old world.
But the one I’ll remember till my dying day
Is how He put that church back on the narrow way
With a half crazed Mississippi squirrel.
The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula.
It was a fight for survival
That broke out in revival.
They were jumpin’ pews and shoutin’ “Hallelujah!”
(Ray Stevens)
I realize this song was a spoof on religion, but it was done in good humor, and we should be able to take a little ribbing for all our self-righteousness. (Beside that, it was also quite comical.) But don’t you wish sometimes that this story could happen in your church just to give the people an idea of what true religion and real revival could be like?
Actually, I don’t believe true revival would be characterized by all the jumping pews and such. Rather, there will be a new infusing of life into the love and witness of the people and a decided overturning of dissention and the chilling atmosphere so often existing in the churches.
posted by David | 7:16 AM
6 Comments:
Interesting poetry
I remember listening to that song.
I think there are people that do need to have a squirrel revival, if that's what it takes!
The Bible says much about true religion, and you are very right, it's not jumping over pews and seeing how loud you can shout.
I like Steve Green's rendition of a Twila Paris song "Unto Me" from his "The Faithful" album. "When you help the helpless, that is true Christianity."
What if we had a revival of people who put God's Word into practice to help their neighbors and think of someone other than themselves!
That would indeed be a revival!
Yes, Sharon, our light would rise in obscurity, and our darkness would be as the noon day, the LORD would guide us continually, and satisfy our soul in drought, and make fat our bones: and we would be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water, whose waters fail not. And we would go and build the the old waste places, that is, the true temple of the Lord, His united church.
Thanks for visiting. Its been a long while. Its good to hear from you.
This is fun stuff.
- Pedro
Pedro,
Good to see you again. True service to the Lord is the good life. Come again, my friend.
Vaya con Dios, companero.
David
Sorry it's been a while. Keep me in your prayers. Writing a book is hard enough, but when God gives you ideas for other books before your first one is published, it makes it even harder.
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